What I Learned During Transitioning Relationships

In the matter of just a month, I went into transition mode with 2 relationships at roughly the same time. And right on target , Kimchi puts out some cartoon that seems to showcase how I approach relationships coming to an evolution.

1. Relationships aren’t failures if they don’t last – With all the pressure of finding the “One” that will satisfy all needs, and that will love and last forever, no wonder we feel frustrated and angry when the ones we had such hopes on don’t go the distance. In reality, most of the relationships that happen in our lives –be it romantic or otherwise – won’t last forever. That’s because relationships have a natural life span that we cannot anticipate or determine from the beginning. Some last long, some very short – but letting go of the notion that they are failures unless they last is a big first step. The next step….
2. Keep what works , let go of what doesn’t – With that in mind, relationships essentially don’t have to end if there is something there that still works. Why throw away everything because a portion of something isn’t working? Instead, transition the relationship into something that fits into what is positive, and let go with the love the things that aren’t meeting the needs of everyone involved.
3. Own Your Shit – That will always help relationships have the potential of enduring in whatever capacity. Whatever choices you make – action or reaction – own that shit. Resentment will only be toxic and could lead to “whatever works” stuff to be drowned out.
4. Take your time to talk – Oh I’m so bad for this. I get caught up in the moment and spout some indecipherable stuff sometimes that I even get lost. That’s why I adore writing. Gives me the time to process as I communicate.
5. Take Time for YOU: When you lose touch with yourself, how good will you be to others? Do you know who you are or is it defined with who you are with another person? There is not “better half” – we are already wonderful whole. Whether you are alone or in a relationship (or more than one), don’t forget the most wonderful relationship of all. YOU.
6. Control what you can – this one is key. We cannot control the actions, choices, decisions of others. Getting caught up in that which is not by our hand will only make you mad. Understand what you need, understand how to meet those needs, and make the choices that support that.

This is what I learned on my journey so far…keep what works, discard the rest 😉